Come to the Dark Side Easter Egg Hunt

So, I worked in a big, beautiful, important, old theatre when I was quite young.  I looked around the theatre and thought; this would be a great place for an Easter Egg Hunt.  Mind you, I had never been to an Easter Egg Hunt, being of the tribe that does not partake. All my life I dreamt of the scene – me in a pretty pastel dress with pretty shoes and a pretty basket. So here was my opportunity to make one happen, minus the outfit.

I started mentioning it to my fellow workers, they talked it up and suddenly it was an upcoming event.  The House Manager, a scary woman, called me into her office. I went in there shaking. She said,” I understand you’re putting on an Easter Egg Hunt.”  “Yessss,” I said, my voice a quiver. “Well, I’m going to give you money for it.  And I’ll buy the chocolate bunny prize,” said the not so scary now House Manager.  I was grateful and realized the hunt was bigger than I thought.

The engineers sought me out.  “You the one giving the Hunt?”  I nodded. “What kind of eggs?” “Chocolate covered,” I said, thinking – is that not what you use for the Hunt, not being in the know, after all. I was told I had to make a map and know exactly where each egg was placed and after the hunt I had to make sure each and every egg was taken away before the nights performance. They did not want to invite any potential mice that might be in the vicinity.

I invited the front of the house and I put up a sign backstage inviting the cast and backstage crew.  With the money the House Manager gave me, we had a lovely spread. And her prize for the winner - a giant white chocolate squirrel.  I thought this is a little odd, but what did I know?

Suddenly it was time and the Hunt began.  Guess who came to my Easter Egg Hunt?  James Earl Jones.  Yes, Darth Vadar came to my Easter Egg Hunt. And Christopher Plummer. They were so nice and fun, crawling all over the theatre looking for eggs.  We had refreshments after and lots of laughs.

I had labeled it as the First Annual Easter Egg Hunt of the Theatre. Well, it was the only one. A juggernaut of a show moved in, and that was that.  Darth and I, well, we have our memories.

Included With The Apartment

So, I have a friend who has a friend I shall call Audrey.  Audrey is over the age of 70, retired, and decided to be careful with her money.  She came to the conclusion that it would be good to rent a room in an apartment.  Audrey looked and looked and couldn’t seem to find anything decent.

Finally, Audrey came upon an apartment on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. A couple was renting out one of their bedrooms.  The apartment was large, had light and was in a great location. 

Audrey sat in the living room as the couple enumerated all of the benefits.  Audrey could share the kitchen and the living room.   And the couple mentioned something else that was included – a ménage a trois. 

Audrey’s first thought was – Me?  Couldn’t you find anyone younger?  The couple was in their 60s, so maybe Audrey was exactly what they wanted.  Audrey decided the package was not what she was looking for.

When I was very young, I had a boyfriend.  We liked to think we were adventurous.  So we talked about the possibility of a ménage a trois.  My boyfriend lived with his friend, he asked his friend and his friend agreed.  We made plans for the event.  About a week before, I freaked out.  I could not do it.  Something deep in me swelled up and said –NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! 

So, I’m not that adventurous.  I wonder how many people really are.  And what the aftermath is like.